This class (Gospel Christianity class–9:00am each Sunday) has been a god-send for me! I grew up in the church, learned the catechism, discovered God’s grace in my early teens and made profession of faith. Over time the deep-seeded legalism in my traditional upbringing caused me conflict and confusion. I sought other Christian churches for my spiritual growth. The following years were filled with fresh helpful insight about the simplicity of the gospel and the importance of evangelism; the legalism slowly began shedding from my core training. The stories of the bible were examined with great description; becoming more applicable.
As the years passed by, my life accumulated several personal setbacks. My faith was unwavering, until one particular “hit”. This unexpected surprise challenged my faith and whirled my thoughts to a vulnerable place of spiritual doubt and isolation.
I lost the depth to my faith for various reasons resulting in the rapid production of a bitter root. The peace in my life was diminishing. Any hope was foggy, at best. The bitterness only grew when the majority of my Christian friends resorted to pious clichés and Christian religious “talk” making me want to puke. Their recited responses like “just believe” were too simplistic for the roaring battle I was fighting. My current disposition seemed to scare them away. I needed a fearless Christian who could wrestle with me about my doubt and anger.
I have many sincere non-Christian, irreligious friends, (good people) who are intelligent and articulate about what they believe. Their knowledge of the world’s history and religion is extensive. They are not receptive to simple talk. The coin had turned for me as I stood where they stand by asking this question, “Why should I be a Christian?”
It intrigues me to listen to both Christians and non-Christians share their enthusiasm about their convictions. Many of them were raised in families for a particular belief system in a way not so different from mine. More than ever, I was compelled to find the answer as to what I believed.
This Gospel Christianity class is bringing me back full-circle to my doctrinal roots, and helping me to re-believe again. I am not the first Christian to love God and endure a great storm of doubt. In the middle of my restoration and during the current uncertainties of living paycheck to paycheck, I am finding a spiritual peace once again with a hope that is being reaffirmed with my Christian heritage.
I love hymns and praise songs. Singing these songs is the one factor (despite all doubt and darkness) that remained constant with my faith: Singing to God makes me feel as if I were in heaven. Awesome, isn’t it!
My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus Christ, my righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.
On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand,
All other ground is sinking sand.
When darkness veils His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace;
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.
His oath, His covenant, His blood,
Support me in the whelming flood;
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my hope and stay.
When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in Him be found;
In Him, my righteousness, alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.